"The hardest part of raising a child is teaching them to ride bicycles. A shaky child on a bicycle for the first time needs both support and freedom. The realization that this is what the child will always need can hit hard." ~Sloan Wilson
LONG time - no post! Missed you guys.
Of news: CashHappySon moved out on November 1 and I spent most of that month freaking out as he went C.R.A.Z.Y. by going on a debit card rampage and soon racked up LOTS of overdraft fees. Thing is it wasn't a thing he NEEDED, only wanted.
Luckily, I had gone before he moved out and got my name removed from his checking in the unfortunate knowledge that he'd likely do such a thing! He had to sign a power-of-attorney form of some kind. It's weird, I can still write checks on his account, still monitor it via the internet, but will not be held liable if he bounces! After several tongue lashings from Dad & I, he went and cashed in all his savings bonds to be able to bring his checking even.
Thing one. He owed us over $4100 on his car. After much heated discussion he cashed in his retirement savings (BOO HISS) and paid us off. I didn't want him to cash this in, but I also didn't want to worry myself silly over him repaying us and/or losing it when someone sues him over non-payment of such things as his lease, bills, etc.
Thing two. He still owes the hospital about $1300. I'm concerned whether he'll pay them. He has some money left from his retirement cash in checking and we're discussing having him pay them the $300 or so he has currently in checking. He has an agreement with them to pay them $35 a month. As far as I know he hasn't paid them the December payment.
I am trying to divorce myself from obsessing over his finances. I realize he will have to scrape his own knees before he learns - he's always been that kind of kid.
Once's he's flying straight I will of course feel better, and am actually already feeling that way some as emotionally he and I butted heads quite often and it was time for him to wing free on his own.
For Mom to remember:
"The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them." ~ Thomas Merton
On another front - FrugalSon's job has cut his hours way back. Fortunately his only bill is his car insurance and his room & board he pays us. His insurance will go up next month as he and CashHappy were on the same policy and I want that changed. They are on each other's car titles as well so they could receive a multi-car discount. That will stop. I don't want one to be responsible for the other's accidents, etc., especially with one away from home doing who knows what.
The Hubster's job is somewhat stable at this time, but there have been lay-offs in his shop, but he'll be one of the last two to go if it comes to that. Currently he is eligible for early retirement and we could gather in pension and Social Security after unemployment benefits run out so there is not too much to worry about there.
I recently returned from a trip to the sunny pacific coast with my Mom to visit my aunt, her sister. We had a wonderful stay and I left home with $125 in cash to spend and came home w/$53. That was after I spent money each day for breakfast for me and Momma as Auntie didn't cook - and we ate lunch out each day and saved half for supper each night. Auntie is 82 and doesn't cook. I put $30 on my CC for that dumb $15 bag fee each way. For my birthday (FYI: I passed one of those monumental numbers on the hill climb)Mom paid my way there and for a nice rental car. Thank you Momsie!! My job was to help her with all the heavy luggage and do all the pathfinding and driving and see that we made all of our flight connections, etc. A really nice trip.
Upon our return my stepdad's Mom passed away and we had that funeral last week. He had stayed home to tend her during her last days. We were actually afraid that she might pass while we were gone. She was a neat lady and had been my step-gran since I was about 12.
Hubster and I had our 26th wedding anniversary last week. I renewed his contract for another year!
I'm back selling some on ebay, and am emptying out one of my junque' booths as the sales there were pretty slim!
I will add another entry later updating my sidebar stuff as I have kept track of it.
Adding 50 cents to the December $20 Challenge.
December 8th, 2008 at 04:50 pm 1228755026
In the end, you did the right thing. It's best that they learn early this way, basically on their own.
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December 8th, 2008 at 06:03 pm 1228759401
It's good to see you! Happy Anniversary!
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